Derek Nearly Passes Out

When Derek has a day off he gets to be my driver, giving Alden a break.  Today he took me to radiation, then we did some shopping.  By the time that  we got home my arm was really hurting.  I sat in the chair to relax and hope that my arm would feel better.  As Derek walked over to check on me he said " mom you are bleeding."  I looked down and sure enough it looked like blood running down the sides of my arm.

It took me a minute to realize that it was the lines that they drew on me at radiation.  They made an outline of the treated area and took a picture of it for their records.   Derek thinks they should use a different color than red.  Red made him a little weak in the knees.

I May Need a Personal Secretary...

My schedule is getting busier.  It all started with a busy day.  Shane and I went to Ogden Regional Hospital.  He gave blood and I had a radiation treatment.  We made our way two Huntsman for two doctor appointments.
I had a x-ray taken of my arm then went to see Dr Randall.  He said everything looks great and I am ready for physical therapy.  He moved my arm around and asked me how much I could do on my own.  I have been really good to keep my arm in the sling so my muscles are really tight and sore.  I am not to move my hand away from my body in a 90 degree angle.  This will dislocate my shoulder.  My tennis days are over with my left hand.
We also saw Dr. Gouw, my oncologist.  He feels it is OK to wait until after Christmas and the new year to start chemotherapy.  I will try a different chemo that I have not used before.  It is one that is commonly used for Leiomyosarcoma.  It will require me to stay in the hospital for three to four days with a constant drip of the drug and an IV.  The cycle is for three week, so about four days on the drug and two and a half weeks off.  The drugs are Ifosfamide and doxorubicin,  I do need to get a new port put in.  The one I have will not allow blood to be drawn from it.  They will put a new one in that has two access points so that I can have two IVs in at once.  That is great because I have bad veins that do not like to cooperate with needles.

So here is what my new schedule will be like.
Continue radiation every day until next Wednesday.
Start physical therapy this Wednesday, three times a week for six weeks.
Next week I will have a CT Scan and Echo Cardio Gram to make sure my heart will handle this chemo.
I will be scheduled for a new Port a Cath in two weeks.
I will begin Chemotherapy at the beginning of next year.

I am thankful for my family and friends that are so willing to help me get where I need to be.
I am thankful for smart and compassionate doctors.

 

Seven Years Ago..

It was seven years ago today that we received the phone call from the Doctor, telling us that I had cancer and he wanted to see me the next day.

What is the first thing that you do when you are told that you have cancer?  I remember after hanging up the phone and telling Shane, I said "I don't want to have cancer." almost in disbelief.

The first thing that we did was to go to the church and get a blessing from our bishop. I remember that being a great comfort.

As we did research about Leiomyosarcoma we found that the prognosis was not good.  One thing that Shane and I promised each other that we would not talk about the "what ifs".

We have faith that our Heavenly Father knows us and our needs.  He know the desires of our hearts.  He swhat is best for each of us.  Even at times of setback I feel His love.  I know that my life is in His hands,  I am trying to do all that I can and He is doing the rest.  I am thankful for blessings I have received and the countless prayers given in my behalf.  I know our prayers are heard and answered.  I am here today because of them.

Happy Thanksgiving

We have had a wonderful Thanksgiving.  My sister was planning on coming from Wyoming but with the snow and bad roads her family needed to stay close to home.  We missed them.
Shane went out to find some good deals.
The boys tried to find a turkey bowl game to play but the cold kept most people away so they settled for a basketball game with friends.
I tried to put some of the dinner together.

Britney's family came over. Shane and Brit finished dinner,  We tried some new things this year.  We cooked a prime rib, this was the first time we have ever tried to cook one.  We did good!  We had sherbet and sprite in fancy glasses.  We had a great meal and we have many blessings to thankful for.
 
We went to the movie "Tangled".  We all enjoyed the movie.  The little ones stayed interested and entertained.

Of course we watched football and followed our scores for fantasy football.

Another Wonderful Thanksgiving!

Almost Half Way Through Radiation

Today marks the seventh treatment of 15 total,

I have not felt much different.  So I think it is all gong well.

It is weird to think that something that you can't see or feel is actually damaging cells, both good and bad.  I trust that for that minute that I hear the machine working it is taking care of any stray cancer cells.

I am thankful for a good friend and her four wheel drive that got us through the snowy roads today!

The Trip is Longer than the Treatnent

It takes about 20 minutes to drive from our home to the hospital where I have my radiation treatments.  It takes me five minutes to get my brace off and changed into a robe.  It takes less than five minutes to get in the mold and get a dose of radiation.  I am glad I am not driving to Salt Lake every day for what takes less than five minutes

After Thursday's treatment I was very tired so I came home and rested for most of the afternoon.  I am not sure if it was because of the treatment or from getting up early and not being able to go back to sleep.

Friday's treatment went well,  I did not feel bad at all.  Three down twelve to go.

First Day of Radiation

The first day of radiation was the most difficult.   They had my mold on the table where they helped me settle down into it.  I can feel the indents for my head, shoulder, elbow and hand.  The table is not very wide, I had to hold my left arm on my belly so that it would not fall off the side.  I ended up grasping the waistband of my pants to help hold my arm in place and hold very still.

The technicians moved me around on the table and moved it up and down to get all of the coordinates correct.  They took x rays, marked on my arm, moved me again, made some more marks  and took some more x rays.  This process took about 45 minutes.  During that time I could not move at all, except to breath.  My arm began to ache and I had to really work at relaxing to get through the process.

They got me lined up and did the first radiation treatment.  Then I was tattooed, a drop of ink was placed on three places then a poke of the needle made each mark permanent.  They use the marks to line me up with the machine.

Radiation Day One

The day has finally come, I begin radiation.  This first appointment will last an hour because they need to make sure that the computer, machine and my markings are coordinated correctly.  The actual treatment will last for 15 minutes.  The future appointments will not take as long.  I have two more treatments this week and next week I will have four treatments Sunday to Wednesday because of Thanksgiving.  They explained they rarely schedule on Sunday but they realize this will be some of their patients last Thanksgiving.

Clean Fridge

We have an extra refrigerator that often gets neglected.  With Derek's prompting and help, we took it apart and washed it  I am thankful for a helpful son and a clean fridge.

Radiation Treatment Planning

I went to the Cancer Center at Ogden Regional Hospital.  A mold was made for me.  This was done by me laying down on a mat filled with beads on the cat scan bed.  They positioned my arm how it needed to be during the radiation treatments,  They pushed the bag around me then sucked the air out of the bag.  This made it hard and solid.  They made some markings on my arm and put a bb on three spots.  I had a scan taken while in the mold and with the bbs on.  After the scan the bbs were removed and replaced with a dot and circle  made with a permanent marker.  A piece of clear adhesive was put on the markings as they need to stay there until my next appointment.  They will coordinate the images with the computer and the radiation machine and then I will be ready for the treatments.

I am thankful for modern technology,

Something to Think About

Hope begins in the dark, the stubborn hope that if you just show up and try to do the right thing, the dawn will come.
You wait and watch and work: You don't give up.
Anne Lamott

Three Weeks Down Three To Go in this Brace

I have hit the half way mark.  In three more weeks I will see Dr Randall again and I am hoping to be able to move and have more freedom with my right arm. 
I have become somewhat attached to this brace.  I take it off twice a day for exercises, by the time I am finished I am ready for it to be back on.  It helps me feel more stable and I am able to relax it without as much pain.
RADIATION
Monday I went to Huntsman and visited with the radiation oncologist.  She was ready to get me started until she said I would need to come every day for at least three weeks.  I asked if I could have it done closer to home because it would be one hour verses three hours a day.  The drive down and back would be a killer for three weeks.  She quickly referred me to a Dr at Ogden Regional Hospital.
Today I saw the new Dr.  He was very thorough and gave me some very good options.  However he was just filling in for the week.  He will have another Dr look at my case and I will meet with him next week.   I am OK with this.  It will give me more time to heal and they may come up with a plan that would take care of the tumors in my back at the same time.  I am hoping for better treatment overall!

I am Thankful for our Home

I am thankful for the ability we have to own a home.  We have lived here for 15 years.   There is always something to do to keep us busy with this home.  We have fullfilled some woderful dreams and hope to have more dreams come true in our home.


It is big enough to have several families stay at one time.  We love to have our families come visit.  In years past we have had huge gardens, fruit trees and even chickens.  In recent years we have added an above ground swim pool, basketball court and Alden is working on a miniature golf course.  
I am grateful for our home and the neighborhood we live in.

I am Thankful for My Super Siblings,

Here are just a few reasons........
I have always (had to) look up at my big brother Joe.  He has always been a good example to me   He paved the way for the rest of us.  This summer 2009, after our visit he gave me one of his big bear hugs and told me he loved me.  He may appear rough and gruff, but he is a softy on the inside.  I love my big bro!'

                                          Summer 2007

My sister Tammy and I have always been close, maybe because we are only 14 months apart, 
She is so willing and always looking for ways to help me out.  Most recently she brought me clothes from her closet that I could wear cause I did not have any I could war with my brace.  I loved spending time with her this summer.  We put on an open house for her son and new wife.  We went to California together.  She helped me start a quilting project and now she is finishing it for me,  When she visits she looks for ways to help me.  We have spent several Thanksgivings together.  She (we) will be cooking the turkey this year.  We will always be the best of friends, I love my barely younger sister.

When I called and told Darrell that I would be fighting this cancer again he was genuinely concerned and wished the best for me.  We I texted everyone got out of surgery and told them that I was doing ok,  his reply was "Awesome!!  You are as bad as a teenager texting as soon as you possibly can! haha"  I love my brother Darrell.

My brother Lynn would do just about anything for me.  He generously helped us get a timeshare for our families' vacation to Disneyland.  Lynn manufactures motorcycle parts.  His company is Pro Moto Billet   So when I told him I was going to have a bone replaced he asked what they were going to replace it with a  "Bionic Woman Bone?'

I told him I thought he could build me a new bone,  His response was "I would build you anything you asked for."  I am going to keep this loving brother.

Gordon's family is very special to us.  They have spent a lot of time with us.  Their children have built strong relationships with us. When I told Gordon of the spread of cancer to my bone, this was his response.  "Sister you cease to amaze us.  You are an example of so many attributes we strive to have in our lives.  Your positive attitude and endurance a just incredible.  Our family has so much love for you and your family.  We have been talking a lot with the kids about your situation.  They each took our family fast very seriously and are exercising their faith on your behalf.  We  love you very much and our thoughts and prayers will be with you for a successful surgery and speedy recovery." 

My sister Kendra  an incredible young mother of three little children under the age of five.  Her two girls are just 13 months apart.  I know she has her hands full but still has time to check in on me and give me words of encouragement.  This summer Kendra came to my house and we bottles 35 quarts of tomatoes for her food storage.  What a joy it was to work side by side with her.

I am thankful for my super siblings.  I know that our relationships are eternal! 

 

My Magnificent Man

There isn't enough room on the internet to tell all that Shane means to me.  I am grateful for the day we met.  I know that we were meant to be together.  I knew the day of our first date that we would be together forever.
May 31, 1982++ We went on a double date to Flaming Gorge Wyoming.  We walked below the dam and Shane picked up a rock.  He said to me write something on this rock...I wrote "Friends Forever".  He took the rock and skipped it across the river.
He has been there for me in the toughest of times.  We have made many good memories.  I am so thankful for his love and friendship.

November, A Month of Gratitude_____I am Grateful for My Parents

I am grateful every day for the blessing that I have received.  For the month of November I would like to share one of my blessings for each day of the month.

I was born to very good parents that have loved me and did their very best to raise me.  They taught me right from wrong.  My dad taught me to work hard.  He was always busy with work, work at home or work at church.  My mom taught me how to have a positive outlook on life.  She taught me how to handle disappointments.  She helped me learn responsibility by giving me things to do that helped her.  I cooked dinner for my family often.  We  grew a garden, harvested and canned together.  I am who I am today because of my parents.

I love them and I am very grateful for the love and support that they give to me.